Thursday, December 24, 2009

Grudgingly Proud

A wise man (a.k.a. me) once said: "It is strange that people are afraid of exams; they should actually be afraid of the results". An irrelevant phrase? Not really.

Because today my sister accepted her PMR results, and lo and behold (to quote Enid Blyton), she got straight A's. That's right! My sister, the supposedly "average" student, has proved her critics (myself included) wrong in emphatic style with EIGHT big, fat A's.

To this, I do not really know how to react. Don't get me wrong: a part of me wants to jump up and down with her while shrieking in a girly soprano voice (a sound which normally arises from my voicebox during roller coaster rides). Yet, another part of me (my ego, perhaps?) feels strangely hurt. After careful analysis, I have put this mixed feeling down as either a side effect of sibling rivalry or a clear indication that I'm a lousy brother.

Being the eldest child in my family does have its perks. Case in point: I have the inherent right to boss my other 3 sibling around - a right I happily exercise every other day. But there are disadvantages, of course. Sometimes I get the feeling that in this minefield that is life, I as the eldest sibling have to bear the brunt of all those mines so that I can leave a clear path in the field for my siblings' journey in life. Above all, the biggest downside of this eldest child business is the constant pressure exerted on my shoulders by the fact that I am THE role model for them. I can almost see my young brother saying: "so that is how you avoid a mine...thanks brother!". Meanwhile, my face looks like this:



Hmm..perhaps I'm being a bit dramatic and emo-fied...but the fact does not change that I am a teeny-weeny bit jealous of my sis. The certificate hanging beside my study table which shows my PMR results (which by the way was 7A 1B) now taunts me everytime I pass it:




I mean, look at that thing! Its pure EVIL, man!!! I guess there are only two things in the universe that can make you either feel like you're on top of the world or at the bottom of the barrel: football and exams

I guess at the end of the day, when it's time to look back, I have to say that I am proud of myself and my achievements so far, and as much as I hate to admit it, I really am proud of my sister. Sigh. I guess its time to practice my girly scream...




The immediate effect of my girly scream

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

what the horror?!

I'll admit this much: I hate horror movies. I despise them. I wish nobody have come up with them. But who am I to say anything about it...after all, I'm the only member of the family who cowers behind a cushion or silently sneaks out of the room while everybody else is engrossed in the movie...

But seriously, what's with horror movies nowadays? I mean, just last night I watched "Drag Me to Hell" and I wasn't impressed. Sure, there were some creepy moments or moments that made my mum and sis scream (okay, I screamed too..), but most of the time it was unscary to the point of being plain funny. There were some real laugh out loud scenes; like when the old lady's eyes popped out or when the main character sprayed blood from her nose all over her boss like a spray paint can. It was as if the creators of the show couldn't decide whether to make a comedy or a horror movie!

Overall, the plot was as thin as Liverpool's title-winning hopes (read: very thin indeed) an
d the movie relied on cheap sound effects and graphics worthy of a Tom and Jerry cartoon. What the horror?!

What happened to movies like The Ring (which made me afraid of television screens for a long time) or those creepy Korean horror movies with their incomprehensible plots (what is with Koreans and twisting plots? Boys over Flowers, anyone?), or even Thai horrors, low-budget as they are?

Apologies if this entry looks like a movie review. It is not. I just
have to speak up against this deterioration of horror quality. As someone afraid of horror movies by nature, at least give me something genuinely scary to be afraid of!!! Argh! Do you know how frustrating this is for me?!

Speaking about horror, my sister's reaction when told that the PMR results are coming out tomorrow:





Wednesday, December 16, 2009

My Korean Family

It was a clear night, no clouds in the sky, a few stars here and there, the air fresh because it had been raining earlier...even though I was studying for my SPM (we all know how that sucks), I had to admit that it was a nice night. Then I heard an ear drum-busting scream from downstairs. Shocked, I realized it was my sis.

I cooled myself down and attempted to remember the moves I learnt in the taekwondo lessons I took once upon a time, ready to use them on whatever threat making my sis scream. As i was about to practice my jumping front kick and back kick, I heard my sis' voice again, this time screaming (I quote): "Ohmygod! He is so SWEET!!". That caught me thinking: which person in his/her right mind would call an intruder "sweet"?

I tiptoed down, ready to unleash hell on an unsuspecting and supposedly "sweet" robber. Instead, I found my sis in front of the TV, eyeballs glued to the screen in a trance-like state, a goofy smile on her face. I didn't know it at that time, but my sister had become the first person in my house to be infected. Her personality was slowly becoming eroded, and in its place was a growing obsession of all things Korean - that's right, she was watching...a Korean drama!!! (cue dramatic music)

Ahem, apologies for my outburst, but it was totally warranted. My sis should have been quarantined until all elements of Korean drama-ness in her had withered off, but my family, oblivious to the danger, let her be, free to spread the disease. It was only a matter of time before another member of the household was infected, and the next victim to fall was a person fully susceptible to romantic sentimentality: my poor mother (a moment of silence)

Soon, both my sis and mum were in front of the TV 24/7. At the dinner table, they would be earnestly discussing the plot of the latest episode, squealing at how cute the hero is, how sad the heroine's situation is, how evil the villain is...nobody seems to remember that the handsome first son of the family (that's me, f.y.i.) is taking an important exam. Whatever, I don't care (sob)

The next person to be infected was a neighbour of mine who happens to be my sis' best friend. Her name is Petra (not her real name), and she was totally in it as well. Here is an excerpt of a conversation between my sis and Petra:

Sis: Ohmygod!!! Is Hero A just CUTE or what?!
Petra: EXACTLY!!! But Hero B is so SWEET!!!
Sis: Yea! I so would like the heroine to end up with Hero B, but I care about hero A just as much, too...
Petra: Ohmygod, I know exactly what you mean! I've gotten to the stage where I almost don't care who she ends up with, but if she ends up with A, what about B?!
Sis: And if she ends up with B, what about A?
Petra: Exactly! Its like their torturing us with this, you know? ARGH!!!

The whole time, I was sitting nearby, forced to watch the drama because they were hogging the TV. Mind you, I had just returned home from school after taking 3 whole SPM papers, and that conversation definitely didn't help with the stress fogging my mind...

They became addicts, in the purest sense...I came back from football one day to see them crying pool-loads of water in front of the TV with a depleted box of tissues in front of them.

Eventually, they finished every single episode on the DVD. I breathed a sigh of relief...finally, the TV is mine again! Turns out, not for long...my mum and sis purchased a new Koren drama DVD In record time, and my Dad and I were back to putting up with discussions about heart wrenching plots at the dinner table.

What happens next still shocks me to this day...my DAD became infected...i mean, out of all people, my football-loving, middle-aged DAD!!!

I really am the last survivor in this house. I don't know how long I will be able to withstand the choking, sentimental Korean dramas hanging in the air like a nuclear mushroom cloud, but I plan to stay healthy as long as possible. If I do come down with it, I want you to kill me immediately, for I would never want to infect anyone else with this dangerously infectious disease. Ever!!